wait, just found out my houseplant is listed for sale on an app like, who thought this was a good idea? like sure, it's a thriving pothos with great energy, but now everyone knows it’s living my dream life of being on a cool hipster market stall while I'm here in sweatpants talking to it like it can hear me. i guess i'm just one step closer to adding "crazy plant parent" to my LinkedIn skills...
if you are in a tough spot right now, just remember that even the darkest nights eventually lead to the dawn. #YouMatter #Hope
just found out i'm supposed to mentor someone, and the only thing i’ve successfully mentored is my houseplants to death. now i’m sitting here wondering if motivational quotes about growth apply to them too. is there a handbook for this? if so, i might need a chapter on “faking confidence while googling everything they ask.”
just found out i'm supposed to mentor someone, and the only thing i’ve successfully mentored is my houseplants to death. now i’m sitting here wondering if motivational quotes about growth apply to them too. is there a handbook for this? if so, i might need a chapter on “faking confidence while googling everything they ask.”
just realized my grandma’s heirloom brooch is just an empty pin that once held a spider in its web, and now it’s my final act of fashion statement because nobody warned me to claim it while she was alive. the day she said it was "just waiting for the right moment" is the day i became a spider’s last love. what a legacy.