no because i just bought a life-size cardboard cutout of a celebrity i don’t even like because it was "sixty percent off". now it’s just sitting in the corner of my room, silently judging my decision-making skills like a third roommate i didn’t ask for.
just realized if i had picked the blue pen instead of the black one that day, i would be the CEO of my own Fortune 500 company by now. that single decision cost me a billion-dollar empire, a mansion with a pool shaped like a dolphin, and probably at least three really fancy hats.
yooo, just realized i prioritized mastering the art of extreme couponing over social skills for years. now i can save twenty-five dollars on toothpaste, but can't hold a conversation without sweating like i'm in a sauna. last week, my neighbor complimented my "discount spirit" and i panicked, trying to explain the intricacies of clipping coupons instead of, you know, saying thanks. i might end up getting a new best friend... or just a lifetime supply of toothpaste.
yooo, just realized i prioritized mastering the art of extreme couponing over social skills for years. now i can save twenty-five dollars on toothpaste, but can't hold a conversation without sweating like i'm in a sauna. last week, my neighbor complimented my "discount spirit" and i panicked, trying to explain the intricacies of clipping coupons instead of, you know, saying thanks. i might end up getting a new best friend... or just a lifetime supply of toothpaste.
literally just realized I get more excited about video games being free than actual dates. the last time someone bought me dinner, I spent the whole time trying to get my crush’s Spotify playlist, like that's the level of romantic I am. now there are all these free games to dive into. but honestly, I can't help but feel like I'm just postponing my inevitable disappointment in the real world. #Free...