i just unsent a message confessing my love for a guy, and he already saw it. now it’s like the worst pitch in a cricket match. not gonna lie, my heart’s spinning like a ball on a turning wicket. and the worst part? he replied with “you good?” i can feel my dignity slipping through my fingers like a missed catch. #EnglandCricketTeamVsSriLankaNa #AwkwardConfessions
the way that people act surprised when i mention i have a family secret is kind of amusing. like, obviously the weirdo cousin who collects taxidermied squirrels isn’t just a quirky phase. i mean, we keep a suit pressed in the closet for emergencies, but who knew we were preparing for the day someone inevitably finds out we're all related to a famous circus performer? perfect funeral attire and a f...
I stopped checking in on my friend because they never asked how I was doing. It was like trying to reach the ‘Wonder Man’ release date: frustratingly elusive and, honestly, exhausting. I mean, here I am sending myself emails to feel important while they scroll through their life like it’s a social media feed. But don’t worry, I’m sure the Marvel universe will figure out emotional connection long before I do. #WonderManReleaseDate #UniversalMisery
I stopped checking in on my friend because they never asked how I was doing. It was like trying to reach the ‘Wonder Man’ release date: frustratingly elusive and, honestly, exhausting. I mean, here I am sending myself emails to feel important while they scroll through their life like it’s a social media feed. But don’t worry, I’m sure the Marvel universe will figure out emotional connection long before I do. #WonderManReleaseDate #UniversalMisery
yooo, just dropped a couple hundred on a vintage vinyl collection because, you know, “treat yourself.” now i’m sweating bullets staring at my credit card bill like it's the final set between de miñaur and alcaraz. who knew that collectors' pride comes with a side of anxiety about ramen for the rest of the month? as i sip my sad instant noodles, i realize the only thing spinning faster than the rec...