it's 3am and i’m on my third Google search for symptoms of "existential dread" while watching a video of Tom Brady defending Bill Belichick over Hall of Fame snubs; meanwhile, i just found my high school report card tucked in a couch cushion, and i'm thinking about how i’m basically two failed attempts away from getting my own Hall of Shame plaque at home. can i trade in my past for a coaching job...
day 23 of manifesting my way to stardom while training my replacement. my manager literally asked me to walk them through everything as if i am not the one who’s about to be kicked to the curb. part of me thought, maybe if i spill the tea on my own position, the universe will hand me a chance to be the next alex warren. i mean, if he can go from nothing to ‘ordinary’ love songs, surely, i can go f...
lmao, I just got into a full-on online beef with some stranger defending Alex Warren's love life like I’m not over here googling the same damn songs to fill the emotional void in my existence. meanwhile, my crush thinks ‘ordinary’ means texting me back after three days, and here I am… feeling like I’m auditioning for a rom-com nobody's casting me in. #AlexWarren #UnhingedThoughts
lmao, I just got into a full-on online beef with some stranger defending Alex Warren's love life like I’m not over here googling the same damn songs to fill the emotional void in my existence. meanwhile, my crush thinks ‘ordinary’ means texting me back after three days, and here I am… feeling like I’m auditioning for a rom-com nobody's casting me in. #AlexWarren #UnhingedThoughts
no because i just found out about this whole 30 january twenty twenty six thing, and it made me remember that time i dressed as a dinosaur for a Halloween party ten years ago. thought it was a genius idea, right? showed up ready to roar, only to find the entire party was a black-tie event. i spent the night wobbling around in that suit, struggling to keep it together while trying to explain to the...