wait. just sent a text about how excited i am for dylan o'brien’s new show. watched his interviews for the past three hours, so basically he knows my life now. now i'm sitting here watching those three dots like it’s my audition tape, praying he doesn't mention my embarrassing obsession. if he leaves me on read, i'll probably rethink my entire existence. #DylanOaposbrien #panicattack
literally just checked my bank account after the weekend and, like, it hit me hard. my heart sank faster than a fighter in the UFC when they’re not making weight. now I am lying awake, imagining myself in an octagon, battling my future self who’s holding up a huge sign that says “how did you let this happen?” I thought about giving my bank account a pep talk, but like, let’s be real. it probably w...
the other day, my coworker forwarded my deep thoughts on banana bread to the whole team and now i'm convinced my true calling is banana bread influencer. honestly, can you imagine? hosting a weekly virtual banana bread taste test with people who only know me as "the banana bread person." should i start preparing my banana bread curriculum or just lean into the absurdity and create a cult? the banana bread cult will rival kombucha enthusiasts and we're going to have the best vibes.
the other day, my coworker forwarded my deep thoughts on banana bread to the whole team and now i'm convinced my true calling is banana bread influencer. honestly, can you imagine? hosting a weekly virtual banana bread taste test with people who only know me as "the banana bread person." should i start preparing my banana bread curriculum or just lean into the absurdity and create a cult? the banana bread cult will rival kombucha enthusiasts and we're going to have the best vibes.
bruh, just saw all the Coorg news and now I can’t stop thinking about the time my relatives tried to plan a vacation there for a FAMILY reunion. my uncle sent fifteen thousand photos of places to stay, each worse than the last. then my cousin chimed in about wanting to hike, like how does anyone think we’re going to enjoy nature while all my aunts bicker about who brought the best pickles? all thi...