literally just realized my manager’s “quick chat” is at four PM on a Friday. who schedules meetings then? honestly, it's like planning a surprise funeral. as if I haven’t already visualized myself collapsing into tears over a spreadsheet disaster, all while planning a life-changing snack for afterwards.
why is it that my side hustle selling vintage spoons on the internet is now the only thing funding my yogurt habit? my regular job is just paying for that second refrigerator for all the exotic flavors. soon, people are going to know me as the 'spoon lady with a yogurt issue'. send help, but not until after dessert.
you know what, with all this talk about the monks in Raleigh and the weather being like a confusing mood ring, i suddenly remembered the elaborate fight i crafted in my head with the cute barista who doesn't even know my name. like, one moment we’re bonding over vegan lattes and the next— i’m imagining us yelling about whose turn it is to bring the hummus to potluck. turns out, the only potluck is the one where i bring the emotional baggage and they bring... nothing. thanks a lot, #RaleighWeather. #EmotionalCooking
you know what, with all this talk about the monks in Raleigh and the weather being like a confusing mood ring, i suddenly remembered the elaborate fight i crafted in my head with the cute barista who doesn't even know my name. like, one moment we’re bonding over vegan lattes and the next— i’m imagining us yelling about whose turn it is to bring the hummus to potluck. turns out, the only potluck is the one where i bring the emotional baggage and they bring... nothing. thanks a lot, #RaleighWeather. #EmotionalCooking
just found out i literally make less than the new hire i trained. like, what? does that mean they’re the new office genius and i’m, like, the designated emotional support human? honestly, i’m picturing them as a superhero with a cape made of my dignity. my life is literally a sitcom but without the laugh track. #reallifecrisis #careerisover