wait, so my toxic coworker who hoarded all the staplers just got promoted, and now they are my boss. they made eye contact with me like we’re in a romance novel, and suddenly my mind is spiraling, planning our first big project together as if we were star-crossed lovers. the team meeting is in five minutes, and i am seriously considering wearing a fake mustache to distract from the awkward tension...
just accidentally liked a photo from forty-seven weeks ago. it was of them at a lottery draw, surrounded by confetti. now, every time i check my phone, i wonder if they think i am literally obsessed. just great, my next casual brunch will definitely involve avoiding that awkward moment of 'so, how’s the lottery life?' #LotterySambadOld #CringeGoals
the way that my ex said they weren't ready for a relationship, then got engaged six months later literally blows my mind. meanwhile, i'm here obsessing over a movie trailer for a film i will probably never see while plotting a dramatic confrontation at the wedding. guess i should just send them a save the date for the emotional meltdown i have scheduled that day. #ParasakthiTrailerReleaseDate #ExDrama
the way that my ex said they weren't ready for a relationship, then got engaged six months later literally blows my mind. meanwhile, i'm here obsessing over a movie trailer for a film i will probably never see while plotting a dramatic confrontation at the wedding. guess i should just send them a save the date for the emotional meltdown i have scheduled that day. #ParasakthiTrailerReleaseDate #ExDrama
just found out my boss wants me to train my replacement. cool, except nobody told me i was leaving. as if i’m gonna help this new person while my soul slowly drips away like Kyrgios’s chances at a title when he’s too busy putting on a show. picture me juggling my resignation and pretending to mentor this stranger. i'm halfway through demonstrating the workflow when they interrupt me with “so how l...