the way that one of those celebrity tweets said something like, "what if I just start making sandwich art?" like, honestly, that hits. i mean, my last sandwich literally looked like an art project gone wrong. so i made a viral moment in my kitchen, and now my toast is just a monument to my culinary failures. my parents still think i’m gonna "make something" of myself, and now I'm just waiting for ...
i bought a ridiculously fancy spiralizer because it looked cool and I thought I would become a gourmet vegetable chef. it arrived in a box bigger than my entire kitchen and honestly, I was feeling super ambitious… until the credit card bill came and it turns out, my new identity as a healthy foodie was apparently funded by… wait for it… MY ENTIRE LIFE SAVINGS. now I just stare at this shiny gadget...
yooo, just had an entire argument in my head with the vending machine guy at work. i literally crafted a response for when he inevitably tried to charge me a dollar for the soda. now i am genuinely mad at him. like, he hasn’t even shown up this week. imagine hating someone who is just a voice in your mind. #toxicworkplace #vendingmachinewars
yooo, just had an entire argument in my head with the vending machine guy at work. i literally crafted a response for when he inevitably tried to charge me a dollar for the soda. now i am genuinely mad at him. like, he hasn’t even shown up this week. imagine hating someone who is just a voice in your mind. #toxicworkplace #vendingmachinewars
its not that i’m sad about my favorite artist dropping an album. its just that i had plans to listen while quietly suffering through my job. then my manager tells me to train my replacement without telling me i'm leaving. like, i was planning to dive deep into the lyrics, not into existential dread while explaining my tedious tasks. now i’m just spiraling over who they will be instead of feeling t...