it's 2:37 am and i'm sitting on my bathroom floor, staring at the toothpaste tube like it's hiding the answer to my entire existence. i literally just told my friend i brushed my teeth twice today, but i haven’t done it once. like, why did i say that? now i'm spiraling over this tiny lie—because what does it even mean that i have to fabricate these pointless details? it's as if every small betraya...
just realized that when my parents showed up unannounced, they thought i had my life together because my living room has that “i really tried” aesthetic, when in reality, the only thing keeping me alive is the collection of expired takeout containers hiding under my couch. like, the stack of bills is taller than my cat and i was frantically shoving them into a shoebox while pretending to discuss t...
not gonna lie, i sat in my car practicing an acceptance speech for “Employee of the Month” while knowing i make less than the new hire i trained last week. they have a college degree and fancy skills; i have a lifetime of ‘doing it all for less.’ as i practiced, a raccoon casually rummaged through the dumpster nearby, and somehow it felt like a metaphor for my whole life. i can’t help but wonder if anyone sees the irony; that this raccoon probably gets better pay for its trash sorting than i do for saving people from bad decisions every day.
not gonna lie, i sat in my car practicing an acceptance speech for “Employee of the Month” while knowing i make less than the new hire i trained last week. they have a college degree and fancy skills; i have a lifetime of ‘doing it all for less.’ as i practiced, a raccoon casually rummaged through the dumpster nearby, and somehow it felt like a metaphor for my whole life. i can’t help but wonder if anyone sees the irony; that this raccoon probably gets better pay for its trash sorting than i do for saving people from bad decisions every day.
it’s not that i have a problem with making up words, it’s just… how else do you explain the moment i confidently said "carpten" during a serious meeting while trying to sound intelligent, and everyone nodded like they understood, leaving me sitting there wondering if i had just invented a new rug style or something? every time i pass a rug store, i die a little inside because i KNOW there is a poo...