literally just bought a giant inflatable flamingo because it was “on sale.” my living room is not a tropical resort—sorry, furniture. now every time i walk in, it’s just judging me for poor decisions—while i scroll through social media, watching the hype over this Nikola Bartunkova match like it’s my only source of joy. is this how it feels to have regrets? someone help. #NikolaBartunkova #adultin...
i literally just realized my side hustle selling homemade weirdly shaped soap has become the main reason i can afford my oversized collection of beanie babies. honestly, every time i pack a soap order, i feel like i’m selling an artisanal piece of modern art instead of just a glorified bar of glittery glycerin. like, my biggest problem now is finding cute shipping boxes that won’t ruin the aesthet...
not gonna lie, just caught myself doing a full-on meltdown because my neighbor is suddenly a plant parent and posted their FIFTY-NINE new succulents, while I’m still struggling to keep a single potted fern alive for more than a week—like, how do you even CARE for FIFTY-NINE? Do I need a degree? Am I missing some kind of plant parenting class?—the whole thing is giving me existential dread about my life choices. #PlantParentDrama #SucculentCrisis
not gonna lie, just caught myself doing a full-on meltdown because my neighbor is suddenly a plant parent and posted their FIFTY-NINE new succulents, while I’m still struggling to keep a single potted fern alive for more than a week—like, how do you even CARE for FIFTY-NINE? Do I need a degree? Am I missing some kind of plant parenting class?—the whole thing is giving me existential dread about my life choices. #PlantParentDrama #SucculentCrisis
not gonna lie, just found old texts from when i would literally send three paragraph essays about the perfect fruit salad. like, what was i expecting, a Michelin star for chopping bananas? they clearly stopped replying because my enthusiasm for raspberries was too much, and now i’m left alone, analyzing the legacy of my fruit choices.