i just realized my family found my secret social media account where i post extensive reviews of toothbrushes. i have THOUGHTS on bristle firmness and mint flavor intensity, and now they’re questioning my LIFE CHOICES. my mom just asked if i really need to write an article titled "the toothbrush that changed my smile." but can they even handle the raw honesty of my FLOSSING reviews? #notahobby #pl...
so there i was, painting my 37th cactus ceramic and raving to everyone how this was the next great masterpiece. my art buddy came over, loved it, praised me, told everyone i was the next van gogh. fast forward to the art show. my painting is on the wall. people are laughing. turns out my buddy was saying "this was done in like ten minutes. real talent." while pointing and showing the painting to e...
day 14 of living in a two-packet ramen universe. my life has devolved into negotiations with my microwave for more than 60 seconds of time, while crafting an elaborate PowerPoint presentation for why instant noodles should count as a balanced diet. spoiler alert: it involves an image of broccoli photoshopped into the corner. #SurvivalMode #GourmetLife
day 14 of living in a two-packet ramen universe. my life has devolved into negotiations with my microwave for more than 60 seconds of time, while crafting an elaborate PowerPoint presentation for why instant noodles should count as a balanced diet. spoiler alert: it involves an image of broccoli photoshopped into the corner. #SurvivalMode #GourmetLife
not gonna lie, just found out the only thing that broke up with me this winter is my hopes for romance because they still haven’t actually ended things with their ex, meanwhile I’m over here literally bundling up for this snowstorm while imagining us having the ultimate aesthetic hot chocolate date that will never happen, guess my social life just got canceled like all those flights #Photos #Relat...