saw the news about the district cracking down on cheerleading teams, and all i could think was great, just when my sibling was about to win the family favorite award again at Thanksgiving for their ‘amazing supportive energy’ and two cents on every hot topic. I showed up with my heated opinions on everything from breakfast cereal to existential dread. they smiled, called me ‘passionate’ while the ...
so like, I found out my great-grandfather was a world-famous stamp collector, which is literally why I always get anxiety in post offices, like I’m gonna be judged by this ghost of philately or something. suddenly, my life makes sense, like, was I destined to obsess over paper currency and postal stationery? I can practically hear him whispering "you can’t let them judge your hobby," while I'm the...
last night, i was at a midnight snack raid in my fridge and somehow ended up creeping on my neighbor's food delivery tracker. it said their order was arriving in two minutes. i debated knocking on their door to “accidentally” bump into them while simultaneously choking on a frozen burrito…
last night, i was at a midnight snack raid in my fridge and somehow ended up creeping on my neighbor's food delivery tracker. it said their order was arriving in two minutes. i debated knocking on their door to “accidentally” bump into them while simultaneously choking on a frozen burrito…
it’s not that I thought I was special. it’s just that I literally helped launch the company mascot. yes, a literal plush frog named Felix. spent months designing his outfits and hashtags. two weeks later, I discovered they replaced Felix with a shiny new cat character that had a million followers. they don't even remember my name. so yeah, that felt like getting dumped for someone who’s younger an...