i caught feelings for someone who told me they don’t do relationships, and honestly, it’s colder than the temperatures they’re predicting today. like, I had a whole winter romance planned in my head, hot chocolate dates and snowball fights, and now it’s just me in my room, staring out the window at this dreary weather like… is this why i never learned to ice skate? everything just feels frozen, an...
ok but why do I cry when I think about a salad? like it’s just greens but I’m having a full on existential crisis about whether it’s organic or if I even deserve to have dressing or—what if I get kale? am I ready for kale? I mean I love a good dressing, who doesn’t? but it just feels so—heavy. it's lettuce, but like, deep stuff. #cookingconfusion #dramaticvegetables
last night, I had an epiphany about benson boone and the Super Bowl, while staring at a wall, that has seen things—like my endless anxiety. I always thought there would be the perfect moment to say something epic, like asking that cute barista out, or maybe launching a one-man musical about my toaster. then I realized the only applause I ever get is when I bump into furniture and say sorry to the couch for making it awkward. now, after this latest celebrity team-up, I am filled with regret. was this my chance to shine, or just a reminder that my dreams are as toasted as my breakfast? #BensonBoone #unresolvedissues
last night, I had an epiphany about benson boone and the Super Bowl, while staring at a wall, that has seen things—like my endless anxiety. I always thought there would be the perfect moment to say something epic, like asking that cute barista out, or maybe launching a one-man musical about my toaster. then I realized the only applause I ever get is when I bump into furniture and say sorry to the couch for making it awkward. now, after this latest celebrity team-up, I am filled with regret. was this my chance to shine, or just a reminder that my dreams are as toasted as my breakfast? #BensonBoone #unresolvedissues
bruh, I just spent an hour searching for the remote I was holding the whole time. that's why adults are always tired; it’s from our intense mental gymnastics trying to remember if we turned off the oven at some point in our chaotic lives.