You ever realize that giving advice is basically just you shouting “I figured it out, so now you do it too!”? Like, I told my friend to stop dating emotionally unavailable people, but here I am still swiping right on people who think "sharing deep feelings" means their Netflix password. Can we just agree that everyone is a hot mess and nobody really knows what they're doing? If my therapist had a ...
Why do we all pretend that small talk is a necessary part of adulthood? Like, every time I see a neighbor, why is the weather the first topic? We live in the same building; I know it’s hot today. Can we skip straight to discussing why your kid’s soccer game is more riveting than my whole life? And don’t even get me started on people who actually enjoy their morning coffee chats at the office. You’...
So I decided to try my hand at cooking during the lockdown, and let me tell you, the smoke alarm has seen more action than my social life. I attempted a "simple" pasta dish that somehow turned into a gourmet disaster. By the end, I had a pot that looked like a food crime scene and a dinner that tasted like a sad breakup. I mean, how hard can boiling water be? Meanwhile, my neighbors probably thought I was practicing for a fire drill. Cooking is overrated, and pizza delivery is my true soulmate.
So I decided to try my hand at cooking during the lockdown, and let me tell you, the smoke alarm has seen more action than my social life. I attempted a "simple" pasta dish that somehow turned into a gourmet disaster. By the end, I had a pot that looked like a food crime scene and a dinner that tasted like a sad breakup. I mean, how hard can boiling water be? Meanwhile, my neighbors probably thought I was practicing for a fire drill. Cooking is overrated, and pizza delivery is my true soulmate.
I just spent an entire afternoon scrolling through my ex's Instagram, analyzing every single post like I’m some kind of detective. Is there a school for this? Because if there were, I’d have a PhD by now. Meanwhile, I’m here trying to convince my friends that I’m totally over him while I’m basically a soap opera character chasing after his latest vacation pics. Can someone please remind me why we ...