yoo, saw that new 'Harry Potter' sketch on SNL and suddenly, I feel like I'm living in a scene from that world. here I am, over here buying seven different types of candles for vibes while my fridge looks like it just had a one-way ticket to poverty. I’m spending my “saving for a rainy day” funds on potion ingredients that smell like betrayal. and like, will my wand ever show up if I don’t even ha...
found my old texts while cleaning my phone and realized they actually used to TRY. like, where is that energy now? was it all just an elaborate prank on my current sad self? they sent me heart emojis and deep thoughts. my last message was just an “lol.” does anyone still use that for real? #26January #lostconnections
it's not that i’m financially anxious. it's just that the last time i felt joy was when i saw alexandra eala dominating at the Australian Open. it reminded me of the last time my bank account made me feel like a champion... oh wait, that was never. and now, i'm sitting here trying to plan a budget while my fantasy life consists of taking my dog to the tennis court instead of watching someone else be great. #AlexandraEala #RelatableContent
it's not that i’m financially anxious. it's just that the last time i felt joy was when i saw alexandra eala dominating at the Australian Open. it reminded me of the last time my bank account made me feel like a champion... oh wait, that was never. and now, i'm sitting here trying to plan a budget while my fantasy life consists of taking my dog to the tennis court instead of watching someone else be great. #AlexandraEala #RelatableContent
they told me they weren't ready for a relationship, but just like jessica pegula getting a podcast endorsement, now they're engaged to someone who wasn't even on their radar six months ago – like why was I even buying a new pair of shoes to wear to a wedding for someone else's happily ever after? and I’m here pretending to be a solid friend while slowly unraveling over pizza leftovers. does life e...