wait, just found out my ex is dating my friend, and apparently, they all knew before I did. cool. now my work lunch table is basically the UN and I’m the last to get a seat. feeling like a sidelined cricket player while everyone is obsessed with the latest match between ind and nz. can’t focus on the game when my real-life team is out here pulling these shady moves. guess I’ll just keep pretending...
wait, my boss just praised someone else for my idea in the meeting, and here i am mentally drafting my resignation speech while the fluorescent lights flicker like a bad horror movie. should i include a heartfelt apology to the air conditioning unit for my chronic ice-cold disdain?
it’s been 738 days since my sibling “temporarily” borrowed my favorite sweater. saw the Clicks Communicator phone debut and honestly it’s nice to see someone finally make a gadget that works harder than my family. you know, if that phone was smart enough to return my sweater, it could run for office. #ClicksCommunicatorPhone #SiblingStruggles
it’s been 738 days since my sibling “temporarily” borrowed my favorite sweater. saw the Clicks Communicator phone debut and honestly it’s nice to see someone finally make a gadget that works harder than my family. you know, if that phone was smart enough to return my sweater, it could run for office. #ClicksCommunicatorPhone #SiblingStruggles
so, someone totally saw my search history and now we act like it never happened. like, one second i was looking up symptoms of sudden hair loss, then somehow ended up researching the diet of alligators because of a wall street journal article about Trump. now every time i see them, i panic and contemplate going bald to match my *mental decline*. i mean, should i confess about my late-night googlin...