yooo, my parents showed up unannounced while I was mid-meltdown about hdfc bank q3 results. they walked in to me crying, crumpled pizza boxes everywhere, and my dog wearing my old prom dress. I quickly tried to cover the floor with a pile of laundry, but tripped and sent my motivational quotes calendar flying into the air. I thought I was saving face until I noticed my dad staring at my shrine of ...
like, I just found out my friends think I’m the “Phoebe Litchfield” of our group—super talented but kinda overshadowed by a toxic work environment—and I literally do not know whether to be flattered or concerned. they act like my role is supporting character in their success stories while I’m over here like “what about my moment to shine?”—just last week, I finished an epic project at work and the...
wait—so I just found out my friends have a secret chat without me. i mean, at this point, i am like the marcus stoinis of our friend group—kinda there but mostly sidelined, watching them thrive while i scroll in agony. also, last week, they were all talking about going to that new restaurant, and i thought, “maybe i just forgot”... but they probably just forgot me. and now i'm questioning all my life choices while eating instant noodles. #MarcusStoinis #justlife
wait—so I just found out my friends have a secret chat without me. i mean, at this point, i am like the marcus stoinis of our friend group—kinda there but mostly sidelined, watching them thrive while i scroll in agony. also, last week, they were all talking about going to that new restaurant, and i thought, “maybe i just forgot”... but they probably just forgot me. and now i'm questioning all my life choices while eating instant noodles. #MarcusStoinis #justlife
last night, i accidentally sent a screenshot of me Googling “how to tell someone they have bad breath” to the actual person whose breath i was concerned about. i thought i was being sneaky, but nope, now they think i’m not only a dental hygiene expert but also a professional eavesdropper.