ever look at your camera roll and realize you have pictures of your neighbor’s questionable garden gnome collection? just me? now i have to explain how i have twenty blurry shots of a flamingo with a monocle. how did it come to this?
ever find out what your friends really think of you, only to realize they’ve formed an unofficial book club based entirely on your quirks? apparently, my weird obsession with organizing my socks by mood has become a full-on psychological study. they were debating if I am a genius or just… a lost cause. spoiler alert: they chose the second option and started the first chapter with “why do you need ...
no because just got voluntold to work this weekend again, and it honestly feels like being trapped in a horror movie. it is like they brought in Drew Petzing as the new villain in my life, running the worst offense ever. i just wanted to scroll through memes in peace, not deal with weekend shifts and team meetings where everyone acts like we’re a family, while i pretend not to cry. seriously, how did my life become an unwanted comedy show? #DrewPetzing #adultingwoes
no because just got voluntold to work this weekend again, and it honestly feels like being trapped in a horror movie. it is like they brought in Drew Petzing as the new villain in my life, running the worst offense ever. i just wanted to scroll through memes in peace, not deal with weekend shifts and team meetings where everyone acts like we’re a family, while i pretend not to cry. seriously, how did my life become an unwanted comedy show? #DrewPetzing #adultingwoes
day 47 of pretending to enjoy jogging. just canceled my running group plans because I told everyone my favorite 90s band is reuniting. obviously, that does not exist, but what do you say when your bank account has declared a state of emergency—especially when the highlight of your week is analyzing treadmill stats while sitting on your couch. #liarliar #improvise