day 13 of realizing i spend an hour a day refreshing that university results page. what if my future depends on those three letters? my friends celebrate good grades while i scroll, knowing my past choices might as well be a toddler’s crayon drawing of my hopes. at this point, maybe i should just start charging tuition for my anxiety. but hey, i can always explain my results by blaming bad Wi-Fi. ...
so, there i was, scrolling through a home improvement forum, contemplating whether painting my bathroom bright pink is an act of boldness or desperation. suddenly, i see my childhood friend's dad... claiming my identity to get more clients for his alligator sanctuary. and i think, who knew there was such demand for exotic reptile care? in that moment, i realized my biggest concern is not finding a...
have you ever remembered you were supposed to return that bizarre ceramic elephant figurine you borrowed—weeks ago? and now, I’m standing in front of it like it’s a sacred relic—do I just pretend it was a gift? what if they want to know where their new “family member” went? so many questions—and yet, I still can’t figure out how it ended up becoming a permanent fixture on my kitchen counter. am I supposed to start conversations about the history of elephants in art now?
have you ever remembered you were supposed to return that bizarre ceramic elephant figurine you borrowed—weeks ago? and now, I’m standing in front of it like it’s a sacred relic—do I just pretend it was a gift? what if they want to know where their new “family member” went? so many questions—and yet, I still can’t figure out how it ended up becoming a permanent fixture on my kitchen counter. am I supposed to start conversations about the history of elephants in art now?
so like, i really thought following that weird new health trend was going to fix my life. i spent literally every dollar on kale smoothies, bizarre supplements, and even some green powder that looked like pond scum. my bank account is, like, crying but i can’t tell if it’s from lack of funds or from the actual smoothie detox. now i’m just staring at my fridge, hoping a kale miracle will happen whi...