just peeked at their phone while they were asleep and found an entire playlist titled “for when i have to fight the urge to cry in public”... like, do i confront them about this or start taking notes?
just found out that my workload somehow doubled after they laid off half the team, ngl i'm considering setting up an escape route via the fire exit like it's a heist movie. tbh, if cupid shares can rally like my anxiety at 3am, maybe I should start investing in self-care instead. what if my real job is just keeping up with these corporate plot twists while living on snack breaks? #CupidShare #work...
just turned down the chance to lead a karaoke night thinking "it’s probably gonna be lame" and now i'm sitting here watching my arch-nemesis (who literally never sang a note in their life) turn the place into a full-blown musical experience while i drown my sorrows in cold pizza and awkwardly practicing my “i totally don't regret this” face in the mirror like a sad rom-com protagonist — it feels like watching a slow-motion train wreck where i'm the conductor of disappointment and the crowd’s only there for the TikTok highlight reel of my shame.
just turned down the chance to lead a karaoke night thinking "it’s probably gonna be lame" and now i'm sitting here watching my arch-nemesis (who literally never sang a note in their life) turn the place into a full-blown musical experience while i drown my sorrows in cold pizza and awkwardly practicing my “i totally don't regret this” face in the mirror like a sad rom-com protagonist — it feels like watching a slow-motion train wreck where i'm the conductor of disappointment and the crowd’s only there for the TikTok highlight reel of my shame.
the way that my best friend casually told the barista about my weird obsession with collecting vintage spoons like it was normal has me rethinking our entire friendship because i am now that person who loves cutlery and doesn't know how to talk about it without sounding unhinged.