it's not that i mind working with someone who takes joy in sending passive-aggressive emails, it’s just that now their "motivational" pep talks feel more like a circus act. i mean, they made us do trust falls the other day, but i couldn't even look them in the eye while falling because i still remember them stealing my lunch like it was a performance art piece. so here i am, navigating daily meeti...
—so I walk into my kitchen, expecting a warm hug from my mom— but instead, I see her clutching my old stuffed dinosaur, just staring— “I'm not mad, I’m just disappointed,” she says, holding it like evidence in a court case— because apparently, she expected my fifteen-year-old self to grow up and be an astronaut, not a grown adult still believing that turning on the oven makes me a "chef." ...
yooo, so i was watching trailers for the 'Blade' reboot, right? all hyped, then my uncle calls to tell me our family's always been like vampires. like, straight up BITE anyone who crosses us energy. meanwhile, i haven’t even finished a book this month because my biggest fear is sending a text to my crush without hitting ‘send.’ so now i’m just sitting here, questioning if my anxiety is the family curse instead of a skill. #MarvelsNewestHeroAnticipationB #FamilySecrets
yooo, so i was watching trailers for the 'Blade' reboot, right? all hyped, then my uncle calls to tell me our family's always been like vampires. like, straight up BITE anyone who crosses us energy. meanwhile, i haven’t even finished a book this month because my biggest fear is sending a text to my crush without hitting ‘send.’ so now i’m just sitting here, questioning if my anxiety is the family curse instead of a skill. #MarvelsNewestHeroAnticipationB #FamilySecrets
last night, i realized that the guy i liked back in high school is now a local influencer selling pre-packaged grass clippings as a "wellness product." while i waited for the perfect moment to say something clever to him, he literally turned into a walking meme. now i have to face the fact that my biggest crush is just a TikTok video waiting to happen. so, do i say “i knew you’d grow on me” or jus...