literally just found out my friends think i have the personality of a slow-cooked vegetable. watched the Audi F1 presentation while realizing they probably talk about my awkwardness like it’s a thrilling race. at least Audi has sponsors. me? my only support is my Netflix subscription and a constant loop of “do I exist?” honestly, it’s looking like a wild finish line for me. #AudiF1 #selfown
yooo, just realized my side hustle as a professional duster is actually covering my habit of buying 17 scented candles a week. my room smells like vanilla pineapples with a hint of desperation. who knew dusting would lead to my deep commitment to creating a home vibe worthy of an Instagram influencer? honestly, the more dust I collect, the more I become attached to these candles. it’s now an unhol...
so i was at a networking event, and honestly, i started imagining how my life would be if i dated the guy whose name tag said "blockchain innovator." like, i pictured us debating about decentralized finance over avocado toast while planning our off-grid tiny home. then, i remembered i don't even know how to pronounce 'blockchain' correctly. like, i could be wrong, but i'm pretty sure it has more syllables than my degree.
so i was at a networking event, and honestly, i started imagining how my life would be if i dated the guy whose name tag said "blockchain innovator." like, i pictured us debating about decentralized finance over avocado toast while planning our off-grid tiny home. then, i remembered i don't even know how to pronounce 'blockchain' correctly. like, i could be wrong, but i'm pretty sure it has more syllables than my degree.
no because i just found out my friends have a secret group chat without me. and here i am, worried that erling haaland can’t find the net, when i can’t even find the TIME to be included in FRIENDS GROUPS. i honestly feel like his goal drought is a personal attack on me, like… am i not scoring any friendship points? just to make it worse, my dog is now giving me that "you did this to yourself" look...