it’s 3am and i just got this amazing promotion. no one told me they’d be throwing a parade. so now i keep it to myself. last time i said something, my friend tried to convince me that my happiness was somehow causing the dollar to collapse. “that’s why the currency’s sliding!” she insisted, pointing at the news. i’m just sitting here with a raise and the pressure of saving the world from financial...
literally, I’m sitting here freaking out because my manager just scheduled a 'quick chat' on Friday at four. honestly, I can't tell if they found my secret collection of barista love letters or if they want to talk about my Excel skills, which are as solid as my knowledge of the latest Exeter City lineup. actually, I thought my heart was safe when I fell for the espresso machine energy at the café...
literally thought the world couldn’t get more bizarre until my toxic coworker got promoted to boss. now I have to pretend like I care about her ridiculous ideas, while I'm over here budgeting for ramen, and avoiding looking her in the eye because I’m terrified she'll ask me to give her feedback. funny how I was just thinking that nothing could be more stressful than the Coppa Italia drama. I guess I was wrong. #CoppaItalia #CorporateSurrealism
literally thought the world couldn’t get more bizarre until my toxic coworker got promoted to boss. now I have to pretend like I care about her ridiculous ideas, while I'm over here budgeting for ramen, and avoiding looking her in the eye because I’m terrified she'll ask me to give her feedback. funny how I was just thinking that nothing could be more stressful than the Coppa Italia drama. I guess I was wrong. #CoppaItalia #CorporateSurrealism
so there i was, feeling generous after my third financial meltdown, ready to give my phone charger a second chance after it frayed like my patience during tax season. plugged it in, turned away, and next thing i know, it sparks like it just entered the royal rumble. but here’s the twist: while i was busy sorting out my life, my charger decided to form a partnership with my friend’s new electric sk...