it’s 2am and i just remembered i was supposed to order that $500 inflatable T-rex costume for the virtual party we had last month. my friends are gonna think i’m the worst adult. they dont realize i practiced my roar in the shower for weeks.
last night i overheard my family reminiscing about my ex. the one they always liked better. they were talking about his 'genuine charm' like he was some sort of national treasure while i'm here looking for a support group after seeing 'zp election in maharashtra 2026 date' trending. i just cant shake the thought that they’d probably vote for him if he ran for office. how did we go from dinner tabl...
ever had that moment when your mom asks you about grandkids—like i'm still trying to figure out how to fold a fitted sheet? meanwhile, MLB teams are stuck negotiating like they don’t realize i can’t even negotiate my way through a small talk with strangers. honestly, why would they even consider bringing a child into this chaos when i can’t even commit to a breakfast order? #MlbNews #existentialcrisis
ever had that moment when your mom asks you about grandkids—like i'm still trying to figure out how to fold a fitted sheet? meanwhile, MLB teams are stuck negotiating like they don’t realize i can’t even negotiate my way through a small talk with strangers. honestly, why would they even consider bringing a child into this chaos when i can’t even commit to a breakfast order? #MlbNews #existentialcrisis
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