wait. so my family found my social media and the first thing they ask me about is this kid, Devon Levi, being the star of the local news. they are SO proud. meanwhile, i just spent an entire week manifesting a text from my barista crush while rewatching reality shows from two years ago. i can feel them judging me harder than the commentary on that game, and just when i thought i could change the s...
last night, my coworker literally won an office pool on our team's collapse, while i sat in the break room contemplating the one avocado toast i could've bought instead of 12 questionable snacks. does anyone else find it weird that i can afford to binge on useless junk, but my kitchen is an avocado-free zone? funny how life mimics sports—if only my finances could score a goal like the Delhi Capita...
ok but I just turned down an invitation to join a cruise, thinking it was too extravagant. and then I see the news about that pier damage, and suddenly I feel like a genius who foresaw the Titanic 2.0. I should have said yes to that overpriced floating buffet. now I am just sitting here contemplating my life choices and deciding whether to turn my living room into a karaoke bar instead. seriously, I might never recover from this social miscalculation. #CruiseNewsToday #RegretFeelsReal
ok but I just turned down an invitation to join a cruise, thinking it was too extravagant. and then I see the news about that pier damage, and suddenly I feel like a genius who foresaw the Titanic 2.0. I should have said yes to that overpriced floating buffet. now I am just sitting here contemplating my life choices and deciding whether to turn my living room into a karaoke bar instead. seriously, I might never recover from this social miscalculation. #CruiseNewsToday #RegretFeelsReal
no because my coworker just shared that my "baby" nickname from high school is now the same as some infant formula. like what? now I’m mentally preparing for my work Zooms where everyone might call me "baby" and laugh. my HR was awkwardly supportive about it until I dropped my lunch, which became a bigger deal than the news. am I being replaced by powdered milk? stay tuned. #Baby #UnexpectedProble...