wait. just found out "Good Morning America" filmed at my cousin’s donut shop while I turned down the chance to help. now my family thinks I don’t care about the family business, but honestly, I was busy crying over expired yogurt in the fridge. donut recipes are great and all, but nothing feels worse than realizing you let a golden opportunity slip through your fingers while staring at a probiotic...
no because i just found a group chat from three years ago where we were all aggressively sharing our grocery hauls like we were influencers. one person had a full meal plan and detailed pricing while my only contribution was a blurry picture of frozen waffles that said “like these are gourmet.” we were truly chaotic. i miss when our biggest stress was deciding if brand name ketchup was worth the e...
why does every family holiday dinner turn into an EXPLAIN YOUR LIFE CHOICES intervention? i was just there to enjoy some overly dry turkey, and then suddenly my uncle is bringing up my three hundred dollar collection of old spatulas. he says it is "symbolic" of my poor life choices. literally what? as i took a sip of my sweet tea to avoid the tears, my aunt whispered that "things might improve if I just tried living life differently." like what, joining a spandex-clad cult? #familydrama #lifedecisions
why does every family holiday dinner turn into an EXPLAIN YOUR LIFE CHOICES intervention? i was just there to enjoy some overly dry turkey, and then suddenly my uncle is bringing up my three hundred dollar collection of old spatulas. he says it is "symbolic" of my poor life choices. literally what? as i took a sip of my sweet tea to avoid the tears, my aunt whispered that "things might improve if I just tried living life differently." like what, joining a spandex-clad cult? #familydrama #lifedecisions
i just had an all-out war with a fan account that’s not even for a person, it’s for a kind of pasta, and let me tell you, they are SERIOUS about their allegiance to spaghetti over penne, so here i am defending my one true love, which is tortellini, like this is an actual family feud about noodle preference.