i guess this is how you know you have a future in corporate espionage. just got asked to train my replacement. oh, and by the way, nobody told me i was leaving. so now i’m here trying to convince everyone i am super invested in their success. secretly crafting a fantasy in my head where we partner up and rule the office like it’s a buddy cop movie. this is either a career-ending moment or an award...
last night, I sat down for what was supposed to be a calm holiday dinner, but it quickly spiraled into a full-blown intervention about my LIFE CHOICES—who knew the way I choose to wear socks with sandals would spark such concern? I just wanted to talk about the holiday special on TV. instead, my uncle is passionately detailing how my obsession with collecting nail clippings might not be the health...
last night, I stared at a blank canvas for three hours—just me and my questionable choice to take up painting. I suddenly remembered I moved across the country not for the art, but for a person. that person left me with more paint splatters than memories, and now my biggest achievement is a 12-inch canvas of a cat that looks more like a potato. art degree? yeah, right.
last night, I stared at a blank canvas for three hours—just me and my questionable choice to take up painting. I suddenly remembered I moved across the country not for the art, but for a person. that person left me with more paint splatters than memories, and now my biggest achievement is a 12-inch canvas of a cat that looks more like a potato. art degree? yeah, right.
wait, so i just realized i’m emotionally invested in the love life of a couple i don’t even know because they like literally made eye contact with me once at a coffee shop. now i’m over here researching their zodiac signs and planning how to awkwardly bump into them again just to witness the chaos unfold in my head. i’m living for their relationship drama like it’s my own reality show and like i n...