not gonna lie, saw that cinema news and immediately remembered I spent three months plotting how I would impress a random barista by quoting film classics I haven’t actually watched. in my head, we would bond over Scorsese’s masterpieces while I simultaneously edited my dating profile that nobody will ever see. one fateful day, I decided to finally ask them for their number, and ended up trying to...
just found out current interest rates are skyrocketing. great. i just spent three hours googling “best way to grill an avocado” because my priorities are in shambles. now i’m drowning in debts from recipes i can’t even recreate. honestly, is it too late to get back into video games and leave adulthood behind? #CurrentInterestRates #grillfail
last night I started rewatching the documentary on the darwin incident, and it hit me hard—between the wildness of a humanzee and my own lack of social skills, I realized I still can’t confront that guy at the coffee shop who keeps cutting in line. honestly, it’s so bad that I rehearsed a breakup speech in the mirror instead of just saying “excuse me” because I might as well prepare for emotional fallout while also completely avoiding reality—send help. #TheDarwinIncident #UnhingedBehavior
last night I started rewatching the documentary on the darwin incident, and it hit me hard—between the wildness of a humanzee and my own lack of social skills, I realized I still can’t confront that guy at the coffee shop who keeps cutting in line. honestly, it’s so bad that I rehearsed a breakup speech in the mirror instead of just saying “excuse me” because I might as well prepare for emotional fallout while also completely avoiding reality—send help. #TheDarwinIncident #UnhingedBehavior
it's not that i enjoy being sad, it's just that i spend a little too much time imagining my future life as a person who casually bakes pies with a neighbor who doesn't even exist. how do i keep turning daydreams into drama? should i be concerned that my imaginary neighbor and i have a whole backstory involving seasonal recipe swaps? hashtag delusional. hashtag overthinker.