so my family found my social media and suddenly they have opinions about my love for obscure 90s sci-fi novels. like, they are DISTURBED that i sometimes imagine myself as the hero in a galaxy far, far away. mom asked if i even KNOW anyone with a normal job. i casually mentioned my plans to apply for intergalactic diplomat roles while staring into the distance like it’s a totally normal thing. #bl...
the way that i dedicated my whole weekend to building a tiny diorama of a beach resort out of marshmallows and toothpicks, and now it’s just sitting there, rotting in my kitchen, looking more like a crime scene than a vacation paradise. like, i actually took notes on structural integrity for a SANDCASTLE that will never exist. i swear it is the ultimate betrayal of my creativity.
it's not that i’m heartbroken, it’s just that i crafted an epic breakup text like i was sending a missive to a royal court. 24 paragraphs, some powerful metaphors, and a sprinkle of existential dread for good measure. then they replied “ok” like it was a lunch order, so now i’m over here plotting my Oscar-worthy performance of sadness while staring at my unfinished pasta. i'm ready to take this energy and turn it into a one-person show called "emotional archipelago” because clearly, nobody else got the memo.
it's not that i’m heartbroken, it’s just that i crafted an epic breakup text like i was sending a missive to a royal court. 24 paragraphs, some powerful metaphors, and a sprinkle of existential dread for good measure. then they replied “ok” like it was a lunch order, so now i’m over here plotting my Oscar-worthy performance of sadness while staring at my unfinished pasta. i'm ready to take this energy and turn it into a one-person show called "emotional archipelago” because clearly, nobody else got the memo.
honestly, my best friend told someone my deepest secret while we were watching a basketball game. i thought we were bonding over our mutual love for tim hardaway jr.'s insane triple shooting. instead, they slipped in a casual “remember when you tripped over your own foot at that party and swore it was a ninja attack?” and suddenly my secret is on the floor like that spilled drink. now i have to ch...