why is it that when my partner texted someone else, the toaster felt the need to pop up like it was trying to mediate a therapy session? like, did it think i needed fresh toast for my broken heart? and honestly, does anyone know if home appliances have feelings too, or was the microwave just laughing silently at my emotional turmoil?
i was just staring into the bathroom mirror when i suddenly saw my parents’ faces looking back at me. not in a spooky way, more like they just… appeared, mid-sentence about how i need to stop forgetting my lunch. they both had that same eyebrow raise, and just as i was about to ask if they could help me with my laundry...
it’s not that i’m a subscription hoarder, it’s just that—who can keep track of ten different accounts for things i never use—checked my emails today and saw the list—crying over how many are reminders about NEW YORK TIMES CONNECTIONS HINTS—i get excited about puzzle hints instead of doing actual work—when did my life revolve around crossword clues and ambiguous hints? i can barely connect my own thoughts in a meeting. where did i go wrong? so now, while desperately grasping for puzzle wisdom, i have the emotional maturity of an unpaid intern chasing clouds. #NytConnectionsHints #ChronicOnline
it’s not that i’m a subscription hoarder, it’s just that—who can keep track of ten different accounts for things i never use—checked my emails today and saw the list—crying over how many are reminders about NEW YORK TIMES CONNECTIONS HINTS—i get excited about puzzle hints instead of doing actual work—when did my life revolve around crossword clues and ambiguous hints? i can barely connect my own thoughts in a meeting. where did i go wrong? so now, while desperately grasping for puzzle wisdom, i have the emotional maturity of an unpaid intern chasing clouds. #NytConnectionsHints #ChronicOnline
do you ever find yourself imagining a FULLLY DETAILED backstory for the sock you lost in the laundry? like, that sock had dreams. i wrote a whole novel in my head about how it got trapped in the dryer, wanting to go on adventures but ended up in a trash can. the THRILLING life of a sock, yet here i am, just wishing i could remember to sort my laundry more often.