Not gonna lie, I turned down an offer to teach a local knitting class, and now I watch my neighbor become the knitting queen with a five-part YouTube series about transforming sweaters into dog costumes. And here I am, clutching my ugly Christmas sweater, wondering if that particular skill will be the highlight of my life, while a stuffed corgi models her knitted couture on the internet. #knitflix...
yooo, I just spent three hours planning a ten-minute conversation about how I think penguins might be secretly plotting world domination. I have a whole backstory involving an underground society and special icebergs. Now I can't sleep because I’m just laying here wondering if the UN has been tracking them for decades and if I’m the only one who knows this. honestly, I might start a podcast about ...
last night, i checked my horoscope and it told me to give people second chances. so i did, thinking it would lead to something great. turns out they just used that chance to start something with my neighbor who can barely keep a potted plant alive. not gonna lie, the aftershock from that revelation hit harder than the earthquake in san ramon. maybe i should’ve just stayed inside and skipped the whole "trusting people" thing. #EarthquakeSanRamon #TrustIssues
last night, i checked my horoscope and it told me to give people second chances. so i did, thinking it would lead to something great. turns out they just used that chance to start something with my neighbor who can barely keep a potted plant alive. not gonna lie, the aftershock from that revelation hit harder than the earthquake in san ramon. maybe i should’ve just stayed inside and skipped the whole "trusting people" thing. #EarthquakeSanRamon #TrustIssues
yooo, just got the tea on my childhood friend acting all brand new. like, we used to trade snacks in the school cafeteria, and now they walk past me like i’m a ghost. turns out they are SO invested in this “political drama” they don't even remember my name, but guess who saw me the other day in the aisle at the store, frantically grabbing canned beans and eyeing the gluten-free snacks. it's like, ...