my mom just asked when i’m having kids again. as if i even have a partner to consider this with—i literally just binge-watched every episode of a football team’s season instead of swiping right. honestly, if i devoted half that energy to finding someone, i’d have a full fantasy team. now i’m over here picturing a child named Kenneth Walker Charbonnet when i can barely manage my laundry. maybe one ...
not gonna lie, I just spent three hours crafting a flawless PowerPoint presentation for a meeting—only to realize it was the same meeting I got an email about being canceled. meanwhile, I’ve been obsessively watching highlights of the walker seahawks as if knowing their every move will magically help me get my life together. my notes app is a fever dream of bullet points and confessions—it's like ...
it’s 2 AM and i just realized i hearted my own message on an online forum about fruit. now, i am manifesting a lifelong commitment with the banana emoji that liked my post. we will get matching tattoos, go on adventures, and start a family of fruit-based puns. is this what love feels like?
it’s 2 AM and i just realized i hearted my own message on an online forum about fruit. now, i am manifesting a lifelong commitment with the banana emoji that liked my post. we will get matching tattoos, go on adventures, and start a family of fruit-based puns. is this what love feels like?
yooo, my family is on this weird trip trying to convince me my ex was "better" than my current partner. like, they have this whole memory montage on repeat. meanwhile, i just want to live my life, watch tennis, and figure out how i can pretend the australian open in two thousand twenty-six will somehow validate my relationship choices. it's like the universe is staging an elaborate roast, and i'm ...