last night, i realized my only conversation in weeks was with my reflection while trying to justify my snack choices. even my houseplant looks at me like, “who dis?” ghar wale toh aise baat karte hain jaise main Sharma ji ka beta nahi, balki woh beta hoon jo saare exams me fail ho gaya. koi samajhta nahi, par ab mujhe lag raha hai agar government shutdown hota hai, toh i might actually be more pro...
it's not that i want to drive my car into a tree or anything, it's just... i’ve seen more growth from my office plant than my salary lately. when my boss says "we're like family," right before sharing that there won't be any raises this year, i couldn’t help but mentally rewrite my will. you know, for all the unpaid bills piling up—my real family doesn’t want my twenty-three thousand unopened emai...
yaar, matlab, my life is so chaotic right now that I just binge-watched cooking videos and burnt a toast trying to replicate them. seriously, like, why did nobody tell me cutting onions would make me weep more than my last breakup? hai na, the only "spice" I can handle is what I see on social media when people share their culinary masterpieces, while I just ended up in a toast trauma loop. at this point, I'm convinced even Pathum Nissanka would struggle if he had to take on my kitchen skills. #PathumNissanka #cookingfails
yaar, matlab, my life is so chaotic right now that I just binge-watched cooking videos and burnt a toast trying to replicate them. seriously, like, why did nobody tell me cutting onions would make me weep more than my last breakup? hai na, the only "spice" I can handle is what I see on social media when people share their culinary masterpieces, while I just ended up in a toast trauma loop. at this point, I'm convinced even Pathum Nissanka would struggle if he had to take on my kitchen skills. #PathumNissanka #cookingfails
not gonna lie, i had a whole vision of the future built on second chances, like a sick rom-com script waiting to unfold. but then my heart sank when they picked someone else. you know, while i was over here creating my playlist of beautiful arguments we could have had, just to keep it fresh, they were writing new chapters with someone else. maybe it’s poetic that i was left holding my old love son...