wait, so my sibling just made the fridge into their personal awards shelf, like I didn’t just hear them brag about how they were "best at coloring in kindergarten," and now I have to hang my achievements on the same metal? I mean, my masterpiece of saving a slice of cake for two days is a real work of ART, but I guess my mom forgot to add that to the family timeline, like…
my sibling borrowed money for a “temporary” emergency two years ago and now they keep telling me about the latest spike in meta stock. it’s like they expect me to celebrate their financial enlightenment while my patience runs thinner than their excuses. i keep imagining cashing in on those stocks... maybe at a yard sale, where i could finally buy back my dignity. #MetaStock #SiblingDrama
wait, so I just found out my grandfather played semi-professional basketball in the seventies. like, TENNESSEE vs GEORGIA level stuff, but he never mentioned it—not even during family game nights when I’m out here looking like a four-legged giraffe trying to shoot a hoop. I found an old magazine article with him in a headband—smirking and doing some crazy move. And it hit me that my obsession with dunking donuts wasn’t about the sweets at all—it’s genetic. now I'm thinking, what else is hidden? What else was he— #TennesseeVsGeorgia #FamilySecrets
wait, so I just found out my grandfather played semi-professional basketball in the seventies. like, TENNESSEE vs GEORGIA level stuff, but he never mentioned it—not even during family game nights when I’m out here looking like a four-legged giraffe trying to shoot a hoop. I found an old magazine article with him in a headband—smirking and doing some crazy move. And it hit me that my obsession with dunking donuts wasn’t about the sweets at all—it’s genetic. now I'm thinking, what else is hidden? What else was he— #TennesseeVsGeorgia #FamilySecrets
last night, I finally decided to paint a giant mural of a walrus in a top hat on my bedroom wall because obviously, that is a thing that adults do. now my mom calls me a "weirdo" and my brother refuses to step into my room, like, does he not see the aesthetic genius here? I mean, if a walrus in a top hat doesn’t scream class, what even does...