literally just bought a giant inflatable cactus for my living room. thought it would be the quirky vibe my space needed. then the credit card bill hit me like a ton of bricks. suddenly, i'm staring at a six foot inflatable plant questioning my LIFE CHOICES while my couch silently judges me. sorry, couch. i know i said i was “treating myself.” #homeimprovement #unexpectedregrets
not gonna lie, just sent a screenshot of my online food order to the very restaurant i was lowkey criticizing. like, yes, i meant to tell my friend that their delivery fees are OUTRAGEOUS. now they probably think i am a culinary genius who complains while planning my late-night pizza feast. #whoops #foodiesfollies
literally can't stop thinking about the time someone used my favorite snack as a doorstop at a party. like, who thinks of that? should I stage an elaborate revenge involving an unnecessary number of rubber ducks? what if they remember my snack fondly one day while scrolling on a diet blog and feel actual remorse? #snackdrama #revengefantasies
literally can't stop thinking about the time someone used my favorite snack as a doorstop at a party. like, who thinks of that? should I stage an elaborate revenge involving an unnecessary number of rubber ducks? what if they remember my snack fondly one day while scrolling on a diet blog and feel actual remorse? #snackdrama #revengefantasies
not gonna lie, just had a full existential crisis over how my microwave is more reliable than my friendships. it just keeps heating up, no questions asked. meanwhile, my friend hasn't texted me back in three days. now I'm planning my next meal in case it never happens again.