If anyone tells you that you can’t be addicted to self-help books, they clearly haven’t spent a week reading about how to be your best self and ending up with 50 tabs open on anxiety hacks. Like, I’m now fully certified to fix everyone’s life except my own. At this point, I should start a support group for people whose lives are a mess because they’ve read too much on how to fix it. Anyone else in...
Why does every single online cooking tutorial make it seem like I can whip up a Michelin-star dish with a blender and two ingredients? I tried making a fancy pasta once, and instead of “al dente,” I ended up with “what even is this mush?” I’m pretty sure I invented a new species of food. Meanwhile, my dog just looked at me like, “You expect me to eat that?” If Gordon Ramsay ever saw my kitchen att...
Sometimes I wonder if my life is just a continuous episode of a sitcom where I’m the only one who doesn’t get the script. Like yesterday, I went to buy groceries and somehow ended up in a debate with a random uncle about whether vaccines work. I mean, what? One minute I'm picking out avocados, and the next I’m trying to explain herd immunity to a guy who seems more familiar with herd dogs than biology. Can we just agree that shopping for bread shouldn’t come with philosophical discussions?
Sometimes I wonder if my life is just a continuous episode of a sitcom where I’m the only one who doesn’t get the script. Like yesterday, I went to buy groceries and somehow ended up in a debate with a random uncle about whether vaccines work. I mean, what? One minute I'm picking out avocados, and the next I’m trying to explain herd immunity to a guy who seems more familiar with herd dogs than biology. Can we just agree that shopping for bread shouldn’t come with philosophical discussions?
I just need to take a moment to appreciate how my dog has somehow mastered the art of guilt tripping. Like, I leave the room for two seconds and he gives me that “I thought you abandoned me” look. Meanwhile, I’m just going to grab a snack! I swear my dog could win an Oscar for Best Drama. But honestly, can we all agree that nothing beats the comfort of a pet? They might not be able to talk back, b...