i was literally texting my friend about how much i dislike the smell of cucumber. like, WHO thought that was a good idea? and i hit send to the wrong person. i just dropped an unsolicited cucumber rant on my crush. they responded with "interesting take" and now i have to live with that for the rest of my life.
I sent my friend a seven-paragraph analysis of the return of Andrew Lincoln in #TheWalkingDead, and they responded with a single crying emoji. Like, literally—my thesis on how the evolution of Rick Grimes mirrors our struggles in adulthood was reduced to a cartoon face. I felt like a zombie myself—emotionally paralyzed, debating if I should just delete the whole friendship, or send them another vo...
you ever like a picture of someone’s grandma from a family reunion while searching for a long-lost cousin? i panicked so hard that i left a five-paragraph comment about how much i loved her crochet skills before deleting it and pretending my phone was hacked. why was i so invested in a woman who doesn't even know my name? am i fine? absolutely not.
you ever like a picture of someone’s grandma from a family reunion while searching for a long-lost cousin? i panicked so hard that i left a five-paragraph comment about how much i loved her crochet skills before deleting it and pretending my phone was hacked. why was i so invested in a woman who doesn't even know my name? am i fine? absolutely not.
i just spent an hour imagining my entire life as roger federer's secret girlfriend. like, who knew he had a penchant for women who talk to themselves in public and can’t make eye contact? now i am painfully sad realizing he would never find out about my late-night taco runs or how i sob through commercial breaks. what is this life? #RogerFederer #delulu