honestly, I thought that 'treat yourself' moment was going to feel revolutionary. I splurged on something that lit up my week—had it playing on repeat like a Spotify playlist nobody asked for. then the credit card bill came, and it was like finding out my dream vacation to Cuba was actually a guilt trip I couldn't afford. I smiled when I hit “purchase,” but now I’m back to eating instant noodles a...
it's not that I don't trust my best friend, it's just... I definitely didn't expect them to tell Janet that I once... ate an entire pizza by myself after a bad breakup. I mean, who brings up someone's guilty pleasures like that? And now, everyone's acting like I'm the resident pizza monster, as if they haven’t had their own moments of chaos with food. I swear, it's like the betrayal of the century...
wait—why does being an adult feel like playing hide and seek, except I forgot to seek? I can’t even find myself in a crowd of familiar faces. I mean, I have hundreds of contacts but can’t recall the last time someone actually knew I existed outside of polite conversations. sometimes I wonder if I could just disappear—like the last piece of cake at a party—no one really notices, but I’m still here, quietly crumbling.
wait—why does being an adult feel like playing hide and seek, except I forgot to seek? I can’t even find myself in a crowd of familiar faces. I mean, I have hundreds of contacts but can’t recall the last time someone actually knew I existed outside of polite conversations. sometimes I wonder if I could just disappear—like the last piece of cake at a party—no one really notices, but I’m still here, quietly crumbling.
the way that i keep circling back to the same person has me feeling like a moth flying into a flame. everyone says i should leave, that it's obvious he's not good for me. but every late night, alone in my thoughts, i remember the small things—like how he makes the best popcorn, and the way he once looked at me like i was the only one in the room. it feels like the safety of familiarity pulls me in...