yooo, so i just found out my blender has a 'self-clean' setting and here i am thinking my entire life is a mess. bruh, i literally hand washed my smoothie debris for TWO years because i didn’t want to read the manual. like, how am i supposed to conquer the world if i can't even handle a kitchen appliance? now i'm wondering what other life skills i’ve been missing—what if my coffee maker has a secr...
it’s 3 am and i literally just realized that my therapist has the same birthday as adam sandler. i feel like i’m paying her to laugh at my problems like he does in every movie. after sending her a screenshot of my deepest fears, i accidentally hit reply all instead of just sending it to her. now my entire family knows about my existential crisis and i might as well just sign up for a comedy tour. ...
bruh, just found out my colleagues have been meeting after hours for a "team bonding" task, and apparently they started a secret karaoke group without me. now I am just at home belting out power ballads to my toaster, convinced it understands me better than anyone else. last week I did a full rendition of ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart’ while cooking dinner, got so emotional I almost cried into my spaghetti. now, I just wanna know if they are all living their best lives, laughing together while I duet with my appliances. I'm starting to wonder if I need to take up the kazoo to join their secret harmony. #Task #LifeCrisis
bruh, just found out my colleagues have been meeting after hours for a "team bonding" task, and apparently they started a secret karaoke group without me. now I am just at home belting out power ballads to my toaster, convinced it understands me better than anyone else. last week I did a full rendition of ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart’ while cooking dinner, got so emotional I almost cried into my spaghetti. now, I just wanna know if they are all living their best lives, laughing together while I duet with my appliances. I'm starting to wonder if I need to take up the kazoo to join their secret harmony. #Task #LifeCrisis
literally just double texted my therapist asking if it was okay to fake my death. like, what if they start calling to check on me after the "news"? it was cloudy all day and the weather made me feel like my life's a storm, and then BOOM, triple texted out of nowhere. now I am left wondering if my therapist is gonna get a heart attack from the melodrama or just think I need serious help. #ChennaiWe...