literally just had my aunt call me, full drama mode, to tell me she was “trusting the process” in her skincare routine. like, great idea until she accidentally gave herself a chemical burn. it was a mess. now she’s demanding my sympathy while reminding me how Wrexham let down their fans by dropping points from winning positions. so, what’s next? should i trust the process too? i can’t even keep my...
i just calculated how long it would take to save for a cheese sculpture of my favorite historical figure and honestly—it's the worst news i've ever received. like, who knew cheddar could be such an expensive dream? 12 years and counting—at this rate, i might have to switch to carving it out of foam—still counts as artistry, right? it’s either that or a life of silence while staring at the cheese a...
just accidentally voice texted my thoughts about how all i want is to wear a crown and declare myself ruler of a mythical land – right before a meeting. i thought i was muted. so now i am painfully wondering if my coworkers believe i have secret dreams of a kingdom or if they think my throat’s dry because of some dark secret about what snacks i stash in my desk. there is literally nothing left for me now but to plot my exit strategy or, alternatively – plan the royal ball. #Israel #CrownGoals
just accidentally voice texted my thoughts about how all i want is to wear a crown and declare myself ruler of a mythical land – right before a meeting. i thought i was muted. so now i am painfully wondering if my coworkers believe i have secret dreams of a kingdom or if they think my throat’s dry because of some dark secret about what snacks i stash in my desk. there is literally nothing left for me now but to plot my exit strategy or, alternatively – plan the royal ball. #Israel #CrownGoals
the way that i have literally become the therapist for my parents during their divorce is beyond me. like, one minute i’m sobbing over a romcom, the next i’m dodging their phone calls where they think it’s super chill to share their drama. i honestly didn’t know you could get updates on a divorce like it was a live news report, but here we are. all while the world is buzzing about this ice shootin...