Why does everyone act like adulting is this magical thing? Like, no one warned me that paying bills would feel like a monthly tribute to a shady god that keeps demanding more. And can we talk about how my daily mantra has turned into “please let me get through today without crying”? Honestly, if I have to hear one more person say “just be yourself,” I might lose it. Being myself is how I ended up ...
You ever have that moment when you’re watching a movie and you realize that your life is literally a cheap knockoff of what’s on screen? Like, here I am, pausing my Netflix binge to microwave leftover pizza while the characters are having life-changing epiphanies on a picturesque beach. Meanwhile, I’m struggling to remember if I even paid my bills this month. Honestly, if I had a dollar for every ...
So I finally decided to start cooking to impress my crush, thinking I'd whip up a fancy dinner. Spoiler alert: the "gourmet" pasta turned into a pilot episode of a cooking disaster show. The garlic burned, the water overflowed, and by the end, I was just making toast in a state of full panic. Now, instead of "Hey, I made dinner for you," it's “Please accept this charred offering and know my heart is still in the right place.” Cooking is definitely not my calling, but at least I can now relate to all those kitchen fails on Instagram.
So I finally decided to start cooking to impress my crush, thinking I'd whip up a fancy dinner. Spoiler alert: the "gourmet" pasta turned into a pilot episode of a cooking disaster show. The garlic burned, the water overflowed, and by the end, I was just making toast in a state of full panic. Now, instead of "Hey, I made dinner for you," it's “Please accept this charred offering and know my heart is still in the right place.” Cooking is definitely not my calling, but at least I can now relate to all those kitchen fails on Instagram.
I still send my mom fake photos of me at “fancy” places just to make her think I’m living my best life. Meanwhile, I’m just sitting in my room, eating instant noodles and binge-watching reality TV. Like, how did she raise me to be this dramatic? I just want her to stop asking when I’m getting married, not find out I’m wearing the same sweatpants for three days straight. Can someone else relate or ...