i literally just caught my coworker pretending to solve a rubik's cube that i secretly rigged to be impossible. now they're over there sweating bullets in front of everyone, thinking they will get a trophy for "outstanding problem solving." i can't even decide if i want to intervene or just watch the chaos unfold.
no because i spent three months waiting for the “right moment” to text that one guy, only to find out he’s been getting into making weird documentaries about Kiryas Joel. i can’t even figure out how to make a small talk with the mailman, and now he’s knee-deep in some controversial project. why is it always the ones you want that end up running off with obscure cinematic adventures? #KiryasJoel #r...
it’s not that i care about labels. it’s just that when my situationship introduced me to someone as "a friend," it hit differently. like, do you even know about our underground taco business plan we sketched out at 3am? he casually says "my friend" while i’m sitting there thinking about our whole life with a taco truck named after our favorite dinosaur. and honestly, if we are friends now, who gets to pick the theme for our first annual “i know too much” party?
it’s not that i care about labels. it’s just that when my situationship introduced me to someone as "a friend," it hit differently. like, do you even know about our underground taco business plan we sketched out at 3am? he casually says "my friend" while i’m sitting there thinking about our whole life with a taco truck named after our favorite dinosaur. and honestly, if we are friends now, who gets to pick the theme for our first annual “i know too much” party?
it's three thirty-two AM and i just found out my vintage toy collection is listed for sale on a random auction site. they used MY photos and the caption literally says “must see to appreciate.” so now i’m standing in the dark wondering if my prized plush dinosaur is ready to fight for its dignity. should i send an email or just... let it be?