i woke up again with that nightmare and the fireworks sounded like bombs, it scares me that i cannot remember where it came from or why i have to keep facing it alone when she is right there asleep.
sometimes i think about the time i stole a candy bar from that store when i was ten and the guilt never really went away like maybe if i could have just told someone i would feel lighter but now its like this little dark secret that sits with me and it feels stupid but it still gnaws at me while i watch people race off to space and we are all still stuck down here with our half memories and empty ...
i was convinced that dentist appointment would be a disaster, with all the bad news i was sure they’d find, but turns out my teeth are basically fine and it feels like a huge weight just lifted, like wow, who knew a clean bill of health could make me so light, i can breathe easier now even though that dread was looming over me for weeks.
i was convinced that dentist appointment would be a disaster, with all the bad news i was sure they’d find, but turns out my teeth are basically fine and it feels like a huge weight just lifted, like wow, who knew a clean bill of health could make me so light, i can breathe easier now even though that dread was looming over me for weeks.
just sat here watching my neighbor throw a huge housewarming party, filled with laughter and fancy food, while i microwave my last frozen meal in this tiny studio that smells like old books and takeout. every time i hear them cheer, it hits me hard, like how am i here stuck while they are out there celebrating everything i thought would be mine one day.