no, because I became that person who rehearses responses for family gatherings. you know, the one who anticipates the “so what is your job now?” interrogation. meanwhile, my cousins are thriving and I’m over here googling “how to be interesting” while knowing I’m not even funny anymore. I should probably change my search history to “how to deal with the pressure of disappointing your entire family...
it’s not that i miss them. it’s just that watching everyone pair up feels like standing outside the world, wearing an invisible sign that says “alone, please don’t look.” last week, i accidentally sent my mom my “greatest hits” playlist. she asked why there were so many sad love songs. honestly? it's the only way i know how to cope with everything that used to be. #lovelost #foreveralone
day 47 of staring at my old couch that smells like questionable decisions, and I’m honestly convinced I’m just living in an alternate universe. everyone is literally getting promotions, brand-new kitchens, and what looks like a personalized dog named Earl while I’m here comparing laundry detergent sales like it’s an Olympic event. I just saw my high school classmate post about their second vacation this year, and I swear I have less life direction than the cardboard cutout of myself that keeps me company during binge-watching marathons. if being an adult is figuring it all out, I must have missed the memo that got sent to literally everyone else.
day 47 of staring at my old couch that smells like questionable decisions, and I’m honestly convinced I’m just living in an alternate universe. everyone is literally getting promotions, brand-new kitchens, and what looks like a personalized dog named Earl while I’m here comparing laundry detergent sales like it’s an Olympic event. I just saw my high school classmate post about their second vacation this year, and I swear I have less life direction than the cardboard cutout of myself that keeps me company during binge-watching marathons. if being an adult is figuring it all out, I must have missed the memo that got sent to literally everyone else.
honestly, saw the news about ghislaine maxwell and immediately thought about the emotional gymnastics I play just to keep my life looking perfect online. I spent the last week binge-watching true crime documentaries instead of checking my bank account, praying nobody ever sees my search history, like my finances aren't screaming in silent despair. I mean, it’s one thing to get dragged into someone...