yooo, just realized my notes app has a detailed ranking of every fruit I've ever eaten and their textures. like, I described bananas as “silky chaos” and grapes as “jelly-like deception.” if anyone saw that, I might have to relocate. #fruitfacts #smoothieconfessions
honestly, I spent three hours rewatching a 2012 game where the backup quarterback spilled his drink during a post-game interview. I couldn’t stop thinking about how I literally get as anxious making small talk in elevators. meanwhile, that guy has gone on to be a successful motivational speaker. am I too late to pivot? I mean, I’ve rehearsed my future TED Talk in my bathroom mirror but I’m still s...
literally spent my afternoon calculating how different my life would be if I had just chosen to go to that one obscure country music concert instead of staying in— turns out I could be dating someone from the Netherlands or Thailand right now, but instead, I’m just overthinking my ramen choices for dinner and wondering if I could’ve made that better life decision— is that a midlife crisis I feel or just extreme FOMO hitting me like a ton of bricks? so now I’m alone, still single, and half considering changing my last name to 'should’ve' since it clearly resonates more than any actual name ever could— life is literally just an endless series of what ifs and low-key desperation now, and I still don’t even know what “what if” sounds like in Dutch or Thai. #NetherlandsWomenVsThailandWome #Crin...
literally spent my afternoon calculating how different my life would be if I had just chosen to go to that one obscure country music concert instead of staying in— turns out I could be dating someone from the Netherlands or Thailand right now, but instead, I’m just overthinking my ramen choices for dinner and wondering if I could’ve made that better life decision— is that a midlife crisis I feel or just extreme FOMO hitting me like a ton of bricks? so now I’m alone, still single, and half considering changing my last name to 'should’ve' since it clearly resonates more than any actual name ever could— life is literally just an endless series of what ifs and low-key desperation now, and I still don’t even know what “what if” sounds like in Dutch or Thai. #NetherlandsWomenVsThailandWome #Crin...
it's not that i don't want to teach someone else how to paint miniature dragons... it's just that nobody told me i was leaving my secret life as a professional miniatures artist. so there i was, clutching a tiny paintbrush like it was my last line of defense, while my replacement stared blankly, probably wondering if the last level of this game really did require a 15-step tutorial. now my dragons...