it's 3 a.m. and my plants are starting to look like a crime scene. their leaves are drooping, and it’s like they’re yelling, "help us, or we’ll haunt you." i just caught myself googling “how to apologize to your houseplants” while also preparing a speech for my entire collection about my impending journey to a self-sufficient botany genius. honestly, i’m expecting my succulents to ghost me now bec...
the way that i literally get emotional when a fictional character in a book picks the wrong outfit for an important event is honestly a red flag for me. like, am i too invested? yes. do i talk about this to my cat like they have a say in my taste in fashion? also yes. sometimes i catch myself thinking that maybe they would have avoided disaster if they just asked me for advice.
no, because i was literally up all night stressing over this conversation i’m like, never going to have with my neighbor about his loud music. and here i am refreshing the europa league standings instead of getting actual sleep. like, my life is so chaotic, i am one weird band t-shirt away from just knocking on his door, ready to argue about music taste as if that’s a valid existential crisis. then i realize, this whole situation is so ridiculous that maybe my only escape is joining an underground drum circle, just to drown out the pain. #EuropaLeagueStandings #ExistentialCrisis
no, because i was literally up all night stressing over this conversation i’m like, never going to have with my neighbor about his loud music. and here i am refreshing the europa league standings instead of getting actual sleep. like, my life is so chaotic, i am one weird band t-shirt away from just knocking on his door, ready to argue about music taste as if that’s a valid existential crisis. then i realize, this whole situation is so ridiculous that maybe my only escape is joining an underground drum circle, just to drown out the pain. #EuropaLeagueStandings #ExistentialCrisis
it's three a.m. and i'm hiding in my bathroom with my phone scrolling through all this news about apple's latest acquisitions. my boss just announced he's implementing "innovative ideas" to "enhance our productivity." honestly, when you literally say “innovation” in the middle of the night while eating dry cereal, what does that even mean for us? but here's the kicker: my partner just told me a “l...