yooo, so i found out my friend group has a whole secret chat about being “the hottest cheeseburger in town” - like, what? im out here bringing MY A-game to every barbecue and they’re stacking their buns with puns while i sip on soda like a sad french fry. i could’ve dropped the mic but instead, i just sent them a selfie of me holding a spatula, asking who the real cheeseburger is here - answer me ...
i just realized how much i’ve spent on random subscriptions that i forgot about. first it was that meditation app, then the online cooking classes i never joined. now it turns out, i’m also subscribed to some Ligue des champions highlights that i definitely don’t need to see every week. not gonna lie, at this point my bank account might as well just be cheering for Olympique de Marseille at this p...
not gonna lie, I just accidentally hearted my own post while spiraling over the news about that missing teenager. honestly, it's a reminder that life is literally so chaotic. here I am, feeling guilty for liking my own words like they’re my only comfort, while people are dealing with real heartbreak. my life is a sitcom where the punchline is my ridiculous solitude. now I have to scroll past that heart I can’t undo every single day. #ThomasMedlin #solitaryconfessions
not gonna lie, I just accidentally hearted my own post while spiraling over the news about that missing teenager. honestly, it's a reminder that life is literally so chaotic. here I am, feeling guilty for liking my own words like they’re my only comfort, while people are dealing with real heartbreak. my life is a sitcom where the punchline is my ridiculous solitude. now I have to scroll past that heart I can’t undo every single day. #ThomasMedlin #solitaryconfessions
i wrote an entire thank you speech for the award i never won, and the plot twist? the only audience i had was my cat, who decided to throw up right in the middle of my heartfelt gratitude, like, “thanks for the support, Whiskers, guess you’re still a better critic than half the judges.”