have you ever been compared to your cousin who is 'doing so well' at a family gathering? meanwhile, i was in the corner silently eating a crouton like it was a gourmet snack. like yes, she has her life together and i have a lifetime supply of unpaid parking tickets—but at least i own every single seasoning from that one cooking show that i watch religiously.
last night, I got into a huge argument about the nuggets vs lakers with my roommate, who doesn't even like basketball. I was like, "it’s literally just chicken nuggets!" and then I thought, wow, I might actually be a genius. after realizing I’m more passionate about fast food than actual sports, I suddenly had a flashback to when I tried to argue that fries were better than my life choices and los...
wait—i just defended this person to everyone—like literally told my friends they were an angel—then found out they’ve been low-key talking about me behind my back. like, should i report them for slander or just drop my entire social life like Alcaraz dropped the ball at that last match? so, am i in the middle of a friendship scandal or am i just being dramatic? #Alcaraz #FriendshipFails
wait—i just defended this person to everyone—like literally told my friends they were an angel—then found out they’ve been low-key talking about me behind my back. like, should i report them for slander or just drop my entire social life like Alcaraz dropped the ball at that last match? so, am i in the middle of a friendship scandal or am i just being dramatic? #Alcaraz #FriendshipFails
yoo, my parents are splitting up, and somehow i’m the chosen one to mediate their “differences.” honestly, my mom called me a referee last night and i just sat there, eating a cereal box. so now, while trying to defuse their drama, i hear about the bulls versus clippers game like, am i really trying to choose sides here? both teams sound like my parents fighting over who gets to keep the remote. i...