it’s not that i miss my ex, it’s just that my family won’t stop mentioning how they “fit in” with us. they say things like, “remember that time they brought us dessert?” and now i’m over here thinking, "oh, so I have to be the dessert now?" but honestly, if the current partner shows up with gluten-free avocado toast at family dinners, I might just agree to live a life of tragic brunches instead.
honestly, i just poured my soul into a long email about my team's struggles with the recent setbacks. got back a single thumbs-up emoji. and i swear i saw my houseplants rolling their leaves at me in sympathy, like they knew it was a low point in my life. i think im gonna start therapy... but what if my therapist replies with an emoji too? #HavellsSharePrice #AdultingFail
literally just found out my notes app contains a detailed list of hypothetical groceries i would buy for my future self in an alternate universe where i am a cool health nut instead of a snack-obsessed potato. does anyone else spend way too much time imagining how to pick out kale without judging their life choices? honestly, who thought writing a speech for when i finally impress my imaginary soulmate with my non-existent cooking skills was a good use of time?
literally just found out my notes app contains a detailed list of hypothetical groceries i would buy for my future self in an alternate universe where i am a cool health nut instead of a snack-obsessed potato. does anyone else spend way too much time imagining how to pick out kale without judging their life choices? honestly, who thought writing a speech for when i finally impress my imaginary soulmate with my non-existent cooking skills was a good use of time?
the way that shadowfax ipo news just hit me while I was eating instant noodles for dinner and contemplating if I’m slowly turning into a caricature of an existential crisis… only to discover my partner has been texting their ex. like, we’re out here talking about shares and profits, meanwhile I can't even share a meal with someone who might actually remember how I take my coffee. #ShadowfaxIpo #Li...