so, in a meeting today, my boss praised someone else for an idea I pitched last week. i couldn’t help but smile, but inside, i was like north west at her mother's career advice—“so much for those rules.” as i practiced my acceptance speech for an award in my head, the awkward silence of everyone realizing the truth hit me like a tiktok cringe compilation. maybe next time i’ll just write my ideas o...
found these old texts where I was texting my neighbor about how to use a self-checkout machine, like seriously, was I trying to manifest a romance through produce codes? why was I so invested in detailing how a cucumber registers differently than a watermelon? was that peak flirtation for me back then? I don’t even buy groceries anymore, just rely on magical thinking that one day someone will slid...
i just found out my friends have a whole other chat without me—i mean, really? it's like finding out there’s a secret society where they plan all the things i didn't even know i was missing out on. my mind spirals—what are they talking about? did they finally admit that they, too, have always secretly hated my taste in music? or worse, are they trying to figure out a way to include me in a conversation about the rising bpcl share price—my nightmare—while i’m sitting here googling “how to respond to feelings of exclusion” like it's a regular Tuesday? now i’m not even sure if i'm upset about being left out, or if i’m more terrified about sharing a conspiracy theory about stock prices that will likely crash with my theories of betrayal. #BpclSharePrice #FOMO
i just found out my friends have a whole other chat without me—i mean, really? it's like finding out there’s a secret society where they plan all the things i didn't even know i was missing out on. my mind spirals—what are they talking about? did they finally admit that they, too, have always secretly hated my taste in music? or worse, are they trying to figure out a way to include me in a conversation about the rising bpcl share price—my nightmare—while i’m sitting here googling “how to respond to feelings of exclusion” like it's a regular Tuesday? now i’m not even sure if i'm upset about being left out, or if i’m more terrified about sharing a conspiracy theory about stock prices that will likely crash with my theories of betrayal. #BpclSharePrice #FOMO
literally the other day, my neighbor asked me if I wanted to join their historical reenactment group. i actually said no because, honestly, who has time to wear a wig and act like a twelve hundred-year-old Viking? but now, every time i hear a random clanging noise outside, i just KNOW it’s my neighbor, reliving their glory days while i sit here scrolling through videos of people perfectly roasting...